The First Yule Sale

christmas-money-treeThe first Yule sale
Was in August this year
With aluminum trees
And inflatable deer.
And to the store
They brought truckloads of crap
For consumers to buy
And their kids to unwrap.

Oh well, oh well, oh well, oh well.
Folks will buy anything stores want to sell.

I lookéd up
And saw a man
Putting bags full of Chia pets
Into his van.
And to his friends
He will give them, no doubt,
And they’ll stay in the box
Till their heirs throw them out.

Oh well, oh well, oh well, oh well.
Folks will buy anything stores want to sell.

Copyright © 2013 Alex Riggle. All Rights Reserved.

I Want a New Knee

(with apologies to Huey Lewis)

I want a new knee
One that won’t give me pains
One that won’t make me limp when I walk
Or let me know when it rains

I want a new knee
One that won’t go “click!”
One that won’t keep me up all night
Or make me walk with a stick

One that won’t make me nervous
When I put on a shoe
One that makes me feel
Like I did at 22.

Copyright © 2013 Alex Riggle. All Rights Reserved.